Real Life is Really Hard!

Somehow, I feel like I missed out on the bulletin announcement that declared that real life is really hard. I know I grew up with the philosophy that hard work pays off (and with the unspoken message that if you work hard enough and make enough money, and get everything done, you will be happy and life will be easy), but I've been an adult long enough to know that that is just not true. Money never satisfies, hard work never ends, and there is always work to be done. So why is it that I still expect life to get easier?

Not only did I miss out on the truth that real life is really hard, but I also missed the lesson on how to persevere with a positive attitude. Instead I am a regularly frustrated woman constantly trying to make my world perfect and easier. Moreover, I am too easily annoyed by the inconveniences of life and the repetitive nature of sin in myself and others, instead of responding with compassion and gentleness.

I must be honest. I am tired of real life, and exhausted by trying to make real life easy. I would like a long vacation on a deserted island -- no, not deserted, more like a pampered island where many gentle-folk would come along to please my every whim. I dream of seeing my toes transformed from calloused to soft and beautifully polished, to feel the release of tension in my shoulders after a nice long back rub, to have my appetite refreshed with healthy food followed by a feeding of scrumptious bon-bons. But wait, the dream isn't over. Oh how I'd completely love uninterrupted time to think, pray, reflect quietly, and when I am totally relaxed, to be able to romantically enjoy my husband. And most of all, I'd love my kids to be around, smiling, happy, joyful, and obedient, without ever messing up the peace or requiring me to step up to the parenting plate!

Now doesn't that sound wonderful. But it isn't real life. It is a dream -- a dream that doesn't exist, never will, and most likely would never satisfy my soul. Real life is tiring and requiring, with rewards too great to measure on a day-in-day-out basis. Real life means changing a sleepy-eyed little boy out of his soaking jammies before sipping my first cup of coffee. It means pulling a neck muscle while trying to dislodge the unbalanced washer. It means standing in the rain with a dog who doesn't want to do his business (need to get him together with the little boy). It means relentless training up of the hearts of my kiddos, even when I've said the same thing a over and over again, forgetting that this particular child has only heard it a few times and it was the other one that heard it last week, or last month, or last year.

Yes, real life requires perseverance. It requires serving even if there are no visible signs of appreciation. It means being consistent with the kids, even when I feel like I have no energy left. It means putting a smile on my face as I load the dishwasher and wipe down the counters for the umpteenth time. It means saying "I'm sorry!" to my daughter when my training point turned into a harsh-lecture instead of a gentle rebuke. It means leaning into the Scriptures for the truth and wisdom, and not allowing my feelings to dictate my attitude or actions.

Real life requires real truth. And the truth is this, that according to God's economy...

"He who refreshes others will himself be refreshed." Proverbs 11:25b

and that we all

"... need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, [we] will receive what he has promised." Hebrews 10:36

These promises are set aside for all us that believe in Jesus. We will find them fully realized in heaven, not necessarily on earth (although the Lord does give us good gifts here in the flesh). Our actions and acts of service are never meant to please man, therefore we will never be appreciated enough by our families. But we can serve God, from our hearts, even when real life gets tiring and hard. We can turn to Jesus as our source of strength, knowing He promises to be strong when we are weak. We can remind our self that our worth is not based on our work and that our faith must be based on grace.

Real life is really hard. The question is will my attitude -- will our attitudes -- reflect that of a worn out, weary woman, or rather a saved-by-grace, persevering daughter of the King?

I want to be the later, even though I am more often the former. God is showing me, through real life, that the key is to being the woman I want to be is to renew my mind with the truth as opposed to allowing my feelings to dictate my response. It means accepting the fact that real life is really hard, rather than getting caught up in dreams of a reality that won't ever refresh. It means serving my family and others, even when that feels like the last thing I'd ever want to do, trusting that pouring another glass of milk is much sweeter than savoring a bon-bon on a deserted beach.

Because of Him, I pray you are encourage to persevere in this real life call. Tell me, what tires you about real life? And tell me what Jesus says about it, too.